Friday, January 6, 2012

"She doesn't seem like a Go-Getter."

l-r Interviewing Ms. Vaughn and Meechy Monroe with Tisha (Feb.), Getting my make-up done for the Huetiful Hair Idol Shoot by Celebrity Make-Up artist, Parra Thomas in Atlanta (Aug.), Hosting a show in Chicago (Dec.), After my interview with Rachel of Original Moxie (Nov.), After my interview Karen of Karen's Body Beautiful in New York (Dec.), Getting my faced beat for the first time with Tisha in Atlanta (April), Meeting Chescaleigh for the first time in New York (Oct.), Meeting Alex and Natural Chica for the first time in Atlanta (April), After the BGLH Meet-up in Chicago (Feb.), Last day in Atlanta for the Huetiful Hair Idol Rockstar Experience in Atlanta (Aug.)

This is what someone said about me around five years ago when I disclosed I wanted to become a journalist. I was discussing all of my dreams and aspirations during an already uncomfortable dinner and later, I heard, “this is basically what they thought of you.”
I was crushed. Let it be known that I wasn’t at all closed to these people, but their opinion of me (unfortunately) mattered. Looking back though, I can’t say that I blamed them for thinking that. I was painfully shy back then and sometimes as a journalist, you have to get all up in people’s faces (literally) to get the story.
Fast forward one year later and I got an amazing opportunity to do a piece for my university’s alumni magazine, where I worked closely with the editor along with two other students. Apparently unlike me, the students didn’t think so highly of this arrangement because they skipped out on most of the meetings with the editor. For me, this was a blessing because I got to hang out one-on-one with him and pick his brain. There he told me the one thing I will never forget. “If you want to be a journalist, you have to get over your fear of talking to people you don’t know. How else will you get the story?” That along with a few other two to three hour conversations with him did it for me.

Fast forward to three months later, I got my first byline. I wondered why the other two student’s work wasn’t featured in the piece. After contacting the new editor, I found out they never submitted their work. WOMP!
Two weeks later, that same person who felt I wasn’t ambitious saw my piece in the magazine at their doctor’s office. They later sent their congratulations through the grapevine.
I didn’t stop there. I went on to obtain seven internships in writing and scoring a host of freelance gigs all while still in college. Their direct response? “Wow, you’re just everywhere aren’t you,” they said while holding yet another magazine I was published in. I just smiled and walked away.
Now that I’m on YouTube and adding freelance videographer to my résumé, I remember those same words: “She doesn’t seem like she’s a Go-Getter.” And I kept applying my first mentor’s (the first editor I worked with) advice to new situations.
No matter what you’re doing, always do it to the best ability because you never know what may come out of that situation. Did I know I was going to win the Huetful Hair Idol contest off of the video I did on the last day to enter the competition? Did I know I was going to get contacted by Entwine to do videos for them after doing a review of their products just because I never heard of them before and wanted to try it out for the first time on camera? Did I have one clue that I was going to become a brand ambassador for Original Moxie after talking about how much I genuinely loved their products?
No! Absolutely not. Those things just happened to come my way. But if I wasn’t doing things to the best of my ability, I doubt those opportunities would have been presented to me.
Now that it’s a new year and I know what I want, I am putting my steps in order so I can eventually make those things happen. Having things fall in my lap was great, but now I’m on a mission to go after my dreams!
So the moral of the story is, don’t let anyone tell you what you can or cannot do. You have the power to make your life what you want it to be. No one else, no matter what your current situation is.
Oh and what was the last thing that person said to me last year? “You could be the next Oprah.”
Oh really?


  1. Great post! Everyone has an opinion, some opinions are should just to be ignored though! :) No one can stop what God has in store for you. Go Charyjay :0

  2. Thanks Vee! I appreciate your comment!

    1. Wow needed to read this so much....I have recently chosen to no longer live beneath my potential and so that means doing things and setting goals that people would not normally expect from me and with that comes those who will discourage hate and down talk me but like you said I can not allow people to speak or dictate my life. I have to put my best forward in everything because I want to be my best regardless of how irrelevant or petty my accomplishments or goals may seem to others they are indeed worth it to me. Again continue to appreciate your diversity and the beauty you are blessed with and never forget your worth.


  3. i really needed to hear this. i'm not in the best of happens and i look up and i'm at a point where all of my previous classmates are graduating college and here i am and havent even enrolled yet but i have to keep telling myself i can go out and get the things i want of life and even if it never happens i can take satisfaction in knowing i did my best. thanks charyjay :)

  4. Nice site. I'll be stalking your blog just like the YouTube channel.

  5. I was feeling the same kinda way this morning...great things are possible when you believe in yourself :) You've got a fan in me hun, and I look forward to watching you take over the world!

  6. Great post. You gave me inspiration to put myself out there more and network.

  7. Motivation to the 10th degree! You the next Oprah???....TRUTH.COM!

  8. We have a lot in common. I started out as a Mass Communication major when I was in college, but switched to English. I am a great writer, but I have always been shy. I started my graduate studies in counseling, but became a teacher. I enjoy working with others, but have recently come out of my shell. I am not one to just walk up to someone and start talking to them. I was standing very close to you at the Curly Girls Rock event last Spring, but I was too scared to say something to you. I smiled and continued to stand there waiting for ticket numberes to be read. I am looking to become an educational consultant so that shyness will definitely have to take a backseat:)

  9. I really enjoyed this post!! I am a Mass Communications major also! As much as I love to talk and write I have always been very nervous of what others would think of me and my work! I have a professor that I feel as though I have a very close relationship with who gives me the best advice and wonderful words of encouragement. This year my only resolution is to push all of my fears aside and go after what it is that I want. I've spent too many years living in fear of not being accepted. So I want to say a big THANK YOU for this post because it has inspired me beyond measure!!!!!!

  10. Love this post, very encouraging! Keep up the great work!

  11. Great post! I am getting into journalism now and already blew one opportunity. I learned quick to get over my fear of talking to people I didn't know or I'd never get a story. It's crazy where life takes us. I started out in fashion and am slowing moving into different and exciting circles.

  12. I am glad that you didn't allow someone to steal your thunder! It's a blessing to be able to humble yourself and then see how you are elevated! I am enjoying your ascent! YOU GO GIRL!